When You Mistake Control for Safety Do you find yourself constantly planning for every contingency, struggling to delegate even minor tasks, or feeling intense anxiety when circumstances fall outside your direct influence? Perhaps you create elaborate systems to prevent potential problems, feel uncomfortable with spontaneity or uncertainty, or notice yourself becoming irritable or anxious…
The Difference Between Regulating and Suppressing Emotions Suppressing Emotions. Do you wonder if you’re truly managing your emotions in a healthy way or just pushing them down? Perhaps you pride yourself on “staying calm” during difficult situations, yet notice tension headaches, sleep disturbances, or unexplained irritability emerging later. Maybe you’ve mastered the art of…
Why You Can’t Relax, Even When Things Are Okay Relax. Do you find yourself unable to truly unwind even when external circumstances finally settle? Perhaps you notice persistent tension in your body despite objectively safe surroundings, experience racing thoughts during moments that should allow mental ease, or feel a mysterious sense of impending doom precisely…
You Deserve Peace, Not Just Relief You Deserve Peace. The distinction might seem subtle at first—the difference between momentary relief and genuine peace. Yet this distinction holds profound implications for how we navigate our emotional lives and pursue wellbeing. Relief comes as temporary respite from discomfort: the brief calm after venting frustration, the momentary distraction…
Your Inner Critic Isn’t You, It’s a Survival Voice Inner Critic. Do you experience persistent internal commentary that judges your actions with harsh standards no external person would likely impose? Perhaps you notice a distinct voice within that reliably points out your shortcomings, questions your worth, or predicts negative outcomes despite contrary evidence. Maybe you…
How You Learned to Silence Your Needs Silence Your Needs. Do you find yourself hesitating to express even basic needs—perhaps going hungry rather than asking someone to pass the salt, remaining uncomfortable instead of adjusting the temperature, or tolerating genuine pain rather than requesting help? Maybe you notice yourself automatically minimizing what you require,…
How to Feel Safe in Your Own Body Again How to Feel Safe. Regulation loses its somatic foundation, intuitive decision-making lacks its bodily component, authentic self-expression becomes disconnected from its physical dimension, and present-moment engagement remains partial rather than complete. The resulting fragmentation affects virtually every aspect of human experience, from basic physiological regulation to…
External validation – Why You Keep Waiting for Someone to Choose You External validation. Do you find yourself perpetually waiting to be selected, noticed, or deemed worthy by others? Perhaps you hesitate to pursue meaningful goals without external validation, seek continuous confirmation that you matter to important people in your life, or find yourself…
You Don’t Have to Earn Rest You Don’t Have to Earn Rest. Do you find yourself unable to truly rest without first accomplishing something that justifies this basic human need? Perhaps you notice persistent guilt when attempting to relax without preceding productivity, feel uncomfortable taking breaks unless you’ve reached exhaustion that makes continued activity impossible,…
Why You Overthink Everything (And How to Stop) Overthink. Do you find your mind constantly spinning with analysis, rehearsing conversations before they happen, replaying interactions after they’ve occurred, or generating endless “what if” scenarios about the future? Perhaps you’ve noticed that this mental hyperactivity rarely leads to better solutions or peace of mind but…
