The Loneliness of Always Being ‘The Strong One’ Loneliness. Do you find yourself being the person everyone turns to in a crisis? Perhaps you’re known for your emotional stability, practical advice, and ability to handle whatever life throws your way. Maybe friends, family, and colleagues consistently rely on your strength while rarely asking how…
When You Mistake Control for Safety Do you find yourself constantly planning for every contingency, struggling to delegate even minor tasks, or feeling intense anxiety when circumstances fall outside your direct influence? Perhaps you create elaborate systems to prevent potential problems, feel uncomfortable with spontaneity or uncertainty, or notice yourself becoming irritable or anxious…
You Don’t Have to Earn Rest You Don’t Have to Earn Rest. Do you find yourself unable to truly rest without first accomplishing something that justifies this basic human need? Perhaps you notice persistent guilt when attempting to relax without preceding productivity, feel uncomfortable taking breaks unless you’ve reached exhaustion that makes continued activity impossible,…
Conflict avoidance – Why You Avoid Conflict (Even When You’re Right) Conflict avoidance. Do you find yourself agreeing with others even when you actually hold a different view? Perhaps you experience intense anxiety at the mere hint of disagreement, quickly backtracking or apologizing to restore harmony. Maybe you carefully monitor your opinions to avoid…
External validation – Why You Keep Waiting for Someone to Choose You External validation. Do you find yourself perpetually waiting to be selected, noticed, or deemed worthy by others? Perhaps you hesitate to pursue meaningful goals without external validation, seek continuous confirmation that you matter to important people in your life, or find yourself…
The Healing Power of Saying ‘This Hurt Me’ Healing Power. The words often feel impossible to form—that simple, direct acknowledgment: “This hurt me.” Instead, we find ourselves taking endless detours around this fundamental truth. Perhaps we minimize the impact (“It’s not really a big deal”), intellectualize the experience (“I understand why they did it”), or…
Authentic selfhood – How to Reconnect with the Real You Authentic selfhood. Do you sometimes catch yourself wondering who you actually are beneath the roles you play? Perhaps you’ve become so adept at being what others need—the reliable colleague, the supportive friend, the perfect partner, the successful professional—that you’ve lost connection with your authentic…
The Emotional Cost of Being Hyper-Independent Emotional Cost. Do you pride yourself on rarely needing help, handling challenges alone, or maintaining complete self-sufficiency regardless of circumstances? Perhaps you find it nearly impossible to ask for support even when struggling, feel uncomfortable when others offer assistance, or experience an almost visceral aversion to appearing vulnerable…
Why You Struggle to Ask for Help (Even When You Need It) Why You Struggle. The sensations are familiar: tightness in your throat, a flutter in your stomach, perhaps a slight increase in your heart rate. Your body knows before your mind fully registers it—you need help, yet something blocks you from reaching out.…
Trauma – How Trauma Shows Up in Everyday Decisions Trauma. Do you find yourself making choices that seem logical in the moment but create patterns that don’t align with your deeper values or desires? Perhaps you consistently avoid certain situations that objectively present minimal risk, automatically say yes to requests despite feeling overwhelmed, or…