Feelings of not being “good enough”

Feelings of not being good enough can develop in childhood due to a variety of factors such as family dynamics, social pressures, and personal beliefs. For example, a child who grows up in a household where they are constantly compared to their siblings or parents may develop feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem. Similarly, a child who is bullied or ostracized by their peers may also develop a negative self-image and feelings of not being good enough.

Gestalt therapy and SE can be effective approaches to addressing these feelings of not being good enough. In Gestalt therapy, individuals are encouraged to explore their past experiences and how they have contributed to their current feelings. For example, a person who has been constantly compared to their siblings may explore how this has affected their thinking and behavior patterns. They can also learn to identify their own unique strengths and qualities and develop a greater sense of self-acceptance.

Somatic Experiencing therapy can also be effective in addressing feelings of not being good enough that are rooted in childhood experiences. By becoming more aware of physical sensations and exploring how these feelings are connected to past experiences, individuals can release tension and stress in their bodies and develop a greater sense of self-worth.

For example, a person who was abused as a child may experience physical sensations such as tension in their shoulders or tightness in their chest when thinking about these experiences. Through SE, they can learn to release this tension and develop a greater sense of self-acceptance and self-worth.

It is important to note that addressing feelings of not being good enough in childhood can be a challenging process and may require ongoing support and therapy. However, by addressing these feelings and developing a greater sense of self-acceptance and self-worth, individuals can live more fulfilling and satisfying lives.

Feelings of not being good enough are a common experience that many individuals face throughout their lives. Often, these feelings have their roots in childhood experiences that have led to negative beliefs about themselves. These negative beliefs can persist into adulthood and manifest in a variety of ways, such as low self-esteem, self-criticism, and self-doubt. In psychotherapy, we can explore these beliefs and their origins, and work to challenge and change them.

In Gestalt therapy, the focus is on the present moment and how the individual experiences it. By exploring past experiences and how they have influenced current patterns of thinking and behavior, individuals can gain insight into their beliefs and assumptions about themselves and the world around them. This awareness can help individuals develop a more compassionate and accepting view of themselves and to recognize their own unique strengths and qualities.

For example, a client who has internalized the belief that they are not good enough because of past experiences of peer rejection can explore how this belief has affected their relationships and sense of self-worth. By working with a therapist to challenge this belief and explore alternative perspectives, the client can develop a more positive and accepting view of themselves and approach relationships with greater trust and confidence. Or a client who has internalized the belief that they are not good enough because of past experiences of verbal abuse by a caregiver can explore how this belief has manifested itself in their body as tension and tightness.

Feelings of not being good enough are common experiences that may have their roots in childhood experiences. Individuals can explore these beliefs and experiences, challenge negative beliefs, and develop a greater sense of self-acceptance and self-worth.

*Key words: Feeling that we are not “good enough”, psychotherapy, somatic experiencing therapy, psychotherapist Zagreb, gestalt therapy

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